A little animation
Scene 1
(Open outside a university library. Four impoverished STUDENTS of mixed genders and races come out shivering.)
STUDENT ONE: It's so much harder now that fees have been raised so high.
STUDENT TWO: I don't know how we can afford our education.
STUDENT THREE (pointing upwards): Look out!
(There is movement in the sky. A savage version of the Liberal Democrat bird thingy swoops towards them, its bloody claws outstretched.)
ALL STUDENTS: AARGH!
(BIRDY grabs all four of them with its sharps claws and squawks in delight. It takes off to the sky.)
Scene 2
(The exterior of a grand château. It is very well kept. The EU flag is flying. A sign outside reads "LIBERAL DEMOCRAT HEADQUARTERS". A caricature of LEMBIT ÖPIK is stumbling about outside. BIRDY flies over the exterior and down through a courtyard into a grand room.)
Scene 3
(Interior of the château. A grand ballroom has been adapted as the Liberal Democrat activity room. We pan round various Lib Dems and their activities. Every single one is a white man with a very long nose.
VINCE CABLE is by a vertical rack with two more STUDENTS strung up facing the wall, their books scattered on the ground. VINCE CABLE is gleefully stabbing them in the back.
A GAY COUPLE are cowering on the floor as TIM FARRON, dressed like a Witchfinder General, is persecuting them. Up walks SIMON HUGHES with two faces on opposite sides and a rosette with a changing slogan. Currently it reads "Straight Choice". He joins FARRON in persecuting them then suddenly stops. His head spins round to the other face and his rosette swivels over to "Nice to anyone to get votes". He turns to FARRON and gestures him to stop.
Two BULLS have just produced a massive steaming pile of shit. DAVID HEATH shovels it up and loads it into a machine. Out of the other end come a series of bar charts.
At the throne end of the room is a massive altar draped in the EU flag. DANNY ALEXANDER worships before it then walks over to a bonfire bin. He lights a match and throws it in to an instant fire. Then he loads items in one by one. The first is a charter that says "Principles". Next one that says "Integrity". Then "Honesty". Then a Union Jack. Finally the tuition fees pledge. Close-up and long pause to show the pledge in full before it goes in.
PADDY ASHDOWN is standing by the grand entrance wearing a necklace with the letters GCMG on it. Zoom in on it to show it's a phrase - "God Calls Me God". He looks around nodding approvingly.)
PADDY ASHDOWN: Well done lads. You've taken what I built and run with it.
(BIRDY flies into the room and dumps the STUDENTS on the ground. Multiple LIBERAL DEMOCRATS run over and start sticking knives in their back.
Trumpets sound. An announcement is heard.)
ANNOUNCEMENT: Pray silence for our glorious leader, the Lord President Nick Clegg.
(NICK CLEGG comes through the grand entrance dressed as a Lord gleaming. The other LIBERAL DEMOCRATS start cheering him and BIRDY squawks in delight. He blushes and accepts the praise before removing his coronet and robes, hanging them to CHRIS HUHNE.)
NICK CLEGG: Thank you. Thank you. Isn't it wonderful to be in power now? All we had to do was say the right things and the public fell for it!
CHRIS HUHNE: But my Lord President what happens at the next election? Won't the people gang up on us? What about the mob outside?
Scene 4
(Exterior. An angry crowd assembles.)
Scene 5
(Interior.)
NICK CLEGG (sighing): Chris don't worry. One of the beauties of First Past The Post is that it divides and undermines the people. So their attacks are counterproductive. Watch.
(NICK CLEGG pulls a special bell ring.)
Scene 6
(Exterior. The gates open. The crowd, all carrying lower case letters "f", "p", "t" or "p" as weapons swarm in.)
Scene 7
(Interior. The crowd charges in and attack but their letter weapons make no impact on the LIBERAL DEMOCRATS. Instead the letters slide off and hurt each other.)
NICK CLEGG: You see? The system allows for us to get away with this because our opponents work against each other. We're immune!
CHRIS HUHNE: Unless of course the voting system were changed to allow people to unify their attacks. Such as if the country switch to the Alternative Vote.
(Crash zoom in on NICK CLEGG with stunned realised.)
NICK CLEGG: I didn't think... Oh shit!
(Suddenly the crowd's "f", "p", "t" and "p"s are transformed into razor sharp capital "A" and "V"s.)
CHRIS HUHNE (terrified): It means the people can unite as one with power.
(Several of the crowd put their "A"s together and they transform into a big "a". The crowd lifts it up and starts charging round the room, slicing through DAVID HEATH, SIMON HUGHES and TIM FARRON.)
CHRIS HUHNE (turning white): It means they can destroy us.
(The "A" section of the crowd continues the charge, slicing through DANNY ALEXANDER and PADDY ASHDOWN before ending by ramming the point of the "A" into VINCE CABLE. Meanwhile the rest of the crowd unify their "V"s into a giant "V" which they throw like a boomerang.)
NICK CLEGG (panicking): I should have realised!
(NICK CLEGG, CHRIS HUHNE and BIRDY all scatter. But the spinning "V" slices through CHRIS HUNE. BIRDY takes off but the "V" continues spinning upwards and decapitates it. NICK CLEGG looks around the carnage as the crowd heads towards him and the "V" continues spinning.)
NICK CLEGG (terrified): If I'd realised, I'd never have made such a mistake. I'd never have... offered the people the chance to use the Alternative Vote!
CROWD (to the tune from Lord of the Flies): Kill the Clegg! Cut his throat! Spill his blood!
(The "V" spins towards him and slices through his neck at a 45 degree angle. His head pivots forward and the long nose goes straight into groin. Much blood.
The crowds stand around cheering.)
VOICEOVER: Do you hate the Liberal Democrats?
Do you want to power to get rid of them?
Then vote Yes to AV on the 5th of May.
BBC ANNOUNCER: That was a referendum broadcast by a competent campaign.
(With apologies to the makers of South Park and the Ukip Giant Squid broadcast.)
If this seems a little harsh remember what way the political winds were blowing in 2011. Would it really have been such a bad idea for a campaign seeking to change the way politics are done to attack the way politics was being done at that time?